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Admit it, you should be doing something else really important right now but your on Facebook again.
I`m about as lost as lesbian on ChristianMingle.com
Sorry, I can`t today ... My sister`s friend`s mother`s grandpa`s brother`s grandson`s cousin`s uncle`s fish died. Yes, it was tragic.
People should be loved. Things should be used. Unfortunately, we have it backwards
I’m always impressed when I can stump auto-correct...
Saying “do I smell popcorn ” right after you fart, so everyone takes in a deep breath.
The worst thing about renting movie from a Red Box is that a $1 late fee isn’t enough motivation to get off the couch.
To the person who stole my antidepressants..I hope you`re happy now!!!
Its national shave your... Well, tomorrow is valentine`s day. Just an FYI.
Did you know that DNA actually stands for "National Dislectic Association"
I love everybody. Some I love to be around, some I love to avoid, and others I love to punch in the face.
It`s a small world, but I wouldn`t want to paint it.
Dude, I see you are enjoying a cold Bud Light Lime-a-Rita .... I`m going to assume that`s your smart car parked outside.
Firemen must dread the moment when they`re done for the day and have to find the strength to climb back up the pole.
There`s actually a website designed to simulate what it`s like to be the sole survivor of a nuclear holocaust, it`s called MySpace.