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Urban Dictionary: Helping white folks figure out if they`re getting insulted or complimented daily.
*Financial Status* Just rinsed off a paper plate...
I believe in looking out for number one. Especially if the dog is not house trained.
I´ve always wondered if film directors wake up screaming "CUT! CUT! CUUUUUT!" when they have nightmares.
The trick is to not let people know how weird you really are until its too late for em to back out
is admitting to pushing Humpty Dumpty, he had it coming!!
I’m not stupid. I’m just too lazy to show how smart I am.
I really can’t kick ass, but I’m super good at taking names!
Show him you care by setting his house on fire so he will have to move in with you and never be lonely again.
A group of toddlers is called a migraine
I can`t stand people who use song lyrics in their status` because they remind me of sombody that I used to know
Thanks for the free weekend offer E-Harmony but my wife said I can`t use it.
I hate driving so much that I even ring for taxis on grand theft auto.
My goal today is to turn actions into thoughts.
It`s always fun to act like you don`t see the person running to catch the elevator your in just as the door starts closing.