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There are over 4 million workplace injuries reported every year. Play it safe…call in sick tomorrow.
The face jewelry is getting out of hand. I saw a guy today that looked like he had done a face plant in a tackle box.
I sleep better when I`m naked why can`t my boss understand this?!
I have many thoughts. I just can´t remember any of them.
Why do they ask you "Please press 1 for English, then put you with someone who`s accent is so thick you can`t understand them?
I see your Full House and I raise you 3 episodes of Home Improvement. -Me, not knowing how to play poker, but loving 90`s TV
If listening to stupid people burned calories, I`d be a supermodel.
When I see a tire swing swaying gently in the breeze, I like to believe its daydreaming about life on the open road.
That first kiss in the morning is so special, and the dog enjoys it too.
I bet the guy at the urinal next to me is now rethinking his decision to wear flip flops today.
How Big is Infinity?
Just saw a coyote next to the highway... I hope this tunnel ahead isn`t just painted on.
All cookies are "bite size" if you believe in yourself enough.
We got an extra day this year. Why did it have to be a Monday?
Movie comes on while im in bed: ugh ive seen this a million times. Movie comes on before I have to get ready for work: oh hell yea a classic