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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Sticks and stones may break my bones but words... words might hurt me deeply, causing great emotional, mental, and psychological damage leading toward a lowered self-esteem and irregular bowel movements.
Life can be like Chess sometimes. I don`t know how to play Chess.
Consumer confidence is at an all time high, and so am I.
I got up at 7:00 this morning .. lather rinse repeat ... How long do you have to do this for?
So after vacuuming with the new Dyson, I`m pleasantly surprised to learn that the carpet upstairs is actually hardwood.
I put a dollar in one of those change machines once. Nothing changed.
OMG! I went shopping because I needed a skirt and these earings were on special so I bought four new pairs of shoes!
There’s literally no way to know how many chameleons are in your house.
Ever had one of those days that you feel like you should have skipped the coffee and went straight for the booze?
I can eat anything in the house unless it was specifically bought for my wife but the only way to know it`s for her is to eat it. Apparently
Do you ever start writing a status and half way through you’re just like… nah
Good for you, people that do things.
I want to tell my coworker I have strong feelings for her, but I`m afraid things might get weird if she knows I hate her.
With my eyes. That`s how I roll.
the only way I know something is bad for me is if I like it