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McDonald`s should have a 3rd window, where you can trade in all the wrong sh!t they gave you at the second window.
Never trust a skinny chef
I`ve disappointed a lot of people in my life, you`re not special.
"The Ugly Duckling" has a great message. Everything in life will work itself out once you become physically attractive.
Roman Numerals...what are they good IV?
llllllloooollllll...........................i saw a donkey on a bike
You will attract attention if wearing a skirt on a windy day. This is doubly true if you are a man.
McDonaldβs Management Rule #23: βThe employee with the most severe accent or speech impediment must work the drive-thru at all times.β
Felt like being Bad today, like an Outlaw Bad, felt like doing something illegal, so I ran through the house ripping off all the Mattress Tags..... Come and get me Coppers, but you won`t take me alive.......................
My secret fantasy is to have two women at the same time, one cooking and one cleaning.
βGrandbrotherβ sounds much cooler than uncle.
When you realize that your car matches the one in the Amber Alert.
The worst thing about finding out Santa isn`t real is that you realise it was your parents who were to blame for all the terrible presents
Long busy day, I need one of those hugs that turns into sex.
Four words that I never want to hear: There is no food