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cable TV.... helping us avoid Presidential speeches for nearly four decades
And, yet another day I’ve gone without using calculus.
Don`t ask me for advice, my answer is always get them drunk.
A cash bar on parent-teacher conference nights would be a great fundraiser for schools.
If someone says you used too much butter or cheese on something, stop talking to them. You don`t need that kind of negativity
Gym update: not there
Is it just me or does the word "retweet" bring up images of Elmer Fudd commanding an army on the defensive?
I`m pretty sure if you watched a movie of my life backwards it probably would be about a guy who refills beer cans and puts them in the fridge.
Today I recently discovered how to make my p@nis 12"...I just fold that b!tch in half.
I thought there`d be more sex during my sexual prime.
What did the blanket say as it fell off the bed? Oh sheet.
I`m "BE KIND & REWIND" years old.
Sometimes I send status updates from my phone so it looks like I left the house.
Whoever said "money doesn`t grow on trees" has obviously never sold weed.
My "Kiss me, I`m Irish" shirt only seems to be working on my dog.