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I’m starting to think that the gym isn’t really for me. I went this morning and laid down on the mat to do some sit-ups. I woke up 2 hours later.
I just ran 3.5 miles in 30 minutes! Ha! Just kidding, I ate some ice cream.
How does one get a nice body without moving?
My mother was feeling cold so now I`m wearing a sweater.
is actually feeling pretty much okay about not accomplishing anything this year.
If I ran my legs as much as I did my mouth, I`d be in fantastic shape.
Your family tree must look like a cactus........everybody on it is a pr!ck
Hey Ladies..Prince charming is Gay and living with Mr. Right
is battling with eyelids
It`s not real love unless you leave your phone in plain sight overnight.
went to the book store earlier to buy a Where´s Waldo book. When I got there, I couldn´t find the book anywhere. Well played Waldo, well played.
U make me wish I had more middle fingers
Home alone… Time to teach the neighbors what good music sounds like!
Damn girl are you a cobweb cause you`re really clingy and annoying
I can`t wait til the Presidential race ends so we can stop hating people for their politics and go back to hating people because they`re jerks