Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Every time I get an eyelash in my eye, I`m reminded of how quickly I would die in the wild
The problem with trouble is that it always starts out as fun.
Some of my ideas are about as profitable as selling YOLO T-Shirts at a Reincarnation seminar
To say I wasted today would be a huge insult to the producers of the 3 movies I watched.
Whoa! Thank you warning label! I was actually considering using my new floor lamp in the shower.
All this time I thought PTA stood for Parents to Avoid
Coffee: fueling you for a job you can`t stand to support a life you never wanted. Tastes good though...
I took my family to Sea World this weekend, but i wasnt allowed in. Apparently you cant take your fishing rod.
The snooze button, because there’s nothing like starting your day off with a little procrastination.
Jack The Ripper would be a great name for a fitness trainer.
YouTube is so addicting, I click on a music video and next thing you know I`m watching how to make ice cream.
Falling out of bed the fun way. Oh wait, there isn`t a fun way....
roes are red violets are blue he`s for me not for you if for any chance you`ll take my place i`ll use my fist and smash your face
All my life, I always wanted to be somebody. Now I see that I should have been more specific.
Yesterday I saw something that reminded me of you. I almost stepped in it!