Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Having a contest with my couch and my washing machine to see who has more money. So far I`m in 3rd.
I need a hug right now also five hundred thousand dollars in cash.
You know when you put a stick in water and it looks bent ? That’s why I never take baths...
How do we know that all the ancient Greek sculptures aren`t just victims of Medusa?
Pro tip for picking up girls - keep your back straight and lift with your knees.
With the right person, there is no such thing as inappropriate behavior.
Whoever determined that a 1-inch candy bar should be called " fun size" should really re-evaluate their stanards of entertainment.
“I saw that.” -Karma
Quick question, ladies: If you shave your eyebrows off and then draw them back on, what the hell are you doing?
I`m starting to think I overuse exclamation points. It ends today. Right now. I`ll never ever use one again. I`m so excited about it. Yes.
Word of the day is bishop: My aunt fell down the stairs and I had to pick the bishop.
I saw a bug crawling on my arm and my reaction can only be described as "grabbing for swirling dollars inside a Plexiglas Cash Cube."
Everybody reaches a point in their lives when they die.
You know that button in the elevator with the fireman´s hat on it... turns out that is not the button you press to get a fireman´s hat.
Forget Klondike, you should see what I`d do for an open bar.