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whats the difference between a dog and a fox????? six shots
To error is human, to forgive is divine, to keep your damn mouth shut is much appreciated.
Whenever someone tries to get too friendly with me, I like to call them by the wrong name to remind them of where we stand.
Can Walmart be a feeling? I think that`s how I feel today.
Yeah, you go ahead and climb that mountain "because it`s there", I am going to eat this Pizza "because it`s here"................................
Iron Man is a superhero. Iron woman is a command.
The easiest way to find out if a movie is on Netflix is to simply ask yourself "do I want to see it?" If you do, it`s not on Netflix.
It`s not their fault, per se, but at some point, Crayola has to be held responsible for continuing to make crayons nostril-width.
I must have a great butt because every time I finish talking with someone and start to walk away, I hear them whisper "What an a$$."
Easy come, easy go describes my last 12 cases of beer and 17 relationships.
People say laughter is the best medicine, but I’d like to think a beer is the way to go.
Please help control the pet population, have that special talk with your pet!
I woke up early this morning with the strange desire to get up and exercise. Fortunately I rolled over and closed my eyes really tight and the feeling went away.
Notice how writers don’t rewrite books, how about we stop remaking movies.
Sex, drugs and candy crush all have one thing in common. It`s only an addiction if you start paying for it.