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I want to meet myself from someone else’s point of view.
Why do they waste so much money on all the checkout lanes at Walmart, when they only have two of them open at any given time.
Mondays should start at noon.
Earlier this morning, I was invited to join a XXX facebook group. I was somewhat intrigued until I realized it was a group for guys who like to wear really big shirts.
I have a land line just so that I still have the option to slam the phone down when I angrily hang up on someone.
New Subway rule: You must give the person in front of you a wedgie if they take more than 5 seconds to choose what kind of bread they want.
What do people do with all the extra time they save by writing ”K” instead of ”OK”?
Aren`t they Middle-Age Mutant Ninja Turtles now?
No one in my family has ever actually used the Olive Garden gift card. We just keep passing it down from generation to generation.
Futons are the most disappointing Transformers ever.
When you have the opportunity to become a bigger person, take it because cake is delicious.
It’s never too late for a coffee. After all it’s always morning somewhere in the world.
My bf just got out of jail. Says life in jail for him was a big pain in the a$$
No one your age has any idea what they`re doing either. No matter what age you are.
My desire to be well informed is currently in deep conflict with my need to stay sane.