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"How much for the man cave?" "Sir that`s a doghouse." "Can you install cable?"
I have one question about Insanity, "Are we there yet"?
"..::. :.:.. ::...: .:. :.:: ::.: ..::. :: ::.:..." - Stevie Wonder-
I assume people with dark tinted windows pick their nose more aggressively than the rest of us.
We`re sorry to announce that due to budget cuts the beloved carol "Silver Bells" will be replaced with the more cost effective carol "Aluminium Bells".
The best part about living by myself is not having to explain a lot of things......a LOT of things.
I love you more each day as my other options diminish.
It’s like I wanna be left alone but I still want people to notice my absence, you know.
It`s never going to work out between Mario and the Princess. Most of the time she`s on a whole other level.
Come to think of it, I’ve never seen a taxi fill up at a gas station
If the universe didn`t want me to eat four pop-tarts for breakfast I wouldn`t have four slots on my toaster...
Okay restaurants. Enough with the clever bathroom signs. A simple M and F will do. Sincerely, drunk people.
There are two rules to success in life - 1. Don`t tell people everything you know
If I laugh randomly when you are talking to me, don`t worry, the voices are telling me jokes.
You`re only young once but you can be immature forever!