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Yeah, you go ahead and climb that mountain "because it`s there", I am going to eat this Pizza "because it`s here"................................
Hearing jokes is always 100 times funnier when you have water in your mouth.
Before you judge me, know that I don`t give a crap. Ok, go ahead.
If the Internet was never invented... what would we all be doing now?
i wonder if fish get thirsty .
I was admiring my six pack in the mirror for two hours,then it got cold and I put it in the fridge
My phone tried to autocorrect "f*cking" to "f*ck king," and I was like hell yeah I am.
The pharmacist asked me my birthday again today. Pretty sure she`s going to get me something.
I have problems cleaning my house because I get distracted by all the fun things I find.
Are there actually people who get out of the shower to pee? I want to meet them.
Hey Monday+?+(???) +?+
There is no logical reason why short pants should cost the same as long pants.
Cookies and porn are always better when they`re homemade!
Behind every good selfie is approximately 47 nearly identical pictures that didn`t make the cut.
Talk to your kids about drugs. Maybe they have better connections than you.