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Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Black Friday is Americas version of running with the bulls.
As I said before, I never repeat myself.
PLEASE - put this on your status if you know someone (or are related to someone) who has been eaten by dragons. Dragons are nearly unstoppable and, in case you didn`t know, they can also breathe fire. 93% of people won`t copy and paste this, because they have already been eaten by dragons. 6% of people are sitting in the shower armed with fire extinguishers and the remaining 1% are awesome and will re-post.
Boys are like roses, watch out for the pr!cks...
The Internet makes things so convenient. Before it existed, if you wanted to order a DVD online, you had to invent the Internet.
If revenge is a dish best served cold AND revenge is sweet then revenge is basically ice cream. Bring it.
If by β€œclubbing” you mean eating club sandwiches then yeah I’m pretty into the club scene.
My friend told me he wants to be a secret agent. Based on that alone, I don`t think he`d be a good secret agent.
I`m not the type of person you want to put on speakerphone.
Sweetie, if your gonna be two-faced at least make one of them pretty!
Choosing A Career Is Like Chosing A Wife From 10 Girls. Even If You Pick The Most Beautiful, Intelligent, Kindest Woman, There`s Still Pain Of Losing The Other 9
I want to know what horrific ideas were rejected before they decided "Vagisil" was the best possible brand name?
With great power comes a great electricity bill.
Not to brag, but my bathroom floor is so clean I can sleep on it. Apparently.
C`mon Netflix, we both know I`m watching the next episode. Just go ahead and start it.