Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Fun things to do in Walmart: Take the ``try me`` stickers off of the toys & place them on condom boxes.
Sometimes I wish I wasn`t rich and handsome and delusional.
I wonder if people without dogs actually pick food off the floor?
Anyone else ever thought about farting into one of those plastic cylinders at the bank drive-thru?
I used to make fun of my dog for barking at dogs on TV until I caught myself in the car pulling over for a siren on the radio.
I’m “had to actually call a girl on the home phone to ask her out while hoping my mom didn’t pick up and start dialing” years old.
I like to go on drunk facebook post binges, then claim the next day that someone hacked my account.
B!tch, I will slap you by accident on purpose.
Fish who are caught and released are like the aquatic equivalent of people who claim to have been abducted by aliens.
Don`t judge me just because I sin differently from you.
Sometime you have to hand it to short people ... because they can`t reach.
Plug your headphones into a banana. Everyone will leave you alone twice as much.
I just heard someone say "I can`t wait for 13/13/13" .....let`s take a moment and pray for this dumbass
If Wendy`s think their square burgers are so awesome, why don`t they use square buns?
Oh really? It takes fewer muscles to smile than to frown? How many muscles does it take to mind your own business