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If you`re going to be a d!ck.. At least be a big one.
lol <- looks like a stick man drowning. lol
Just found out that I’m 53 Cheetos tall.
I start to feel really anxious when my work piles up. I never know what to ignore first.
It`s called Wal-Mart because the Center for Disease Control was taken.
Could you imagine if guys commented on their guy friends` profiles the way girls do? "Bro, you look so handsome" "Looking hot, man!" "OMG, your jawline is cray" "Ugh, how are you this perfect dude? I`m jelly" "sexy much?!"
Never squat with your spurs on
If you see me laughing like a crazy person, think nothing of it ..it`s just the voices in my head telling me jokes!
Pringles should make their containers like a Push Up Pop.
The filling in this fortune cookie tastes like paper...
Screw your recommended serving size. You don`t know me.
It’s the people that DON`T talk to themselves that are the crazy ones. At least that’s what I tell myself.
I`m surrounded by sex addicts & alcoholics. So glad I found y`all.
I need a new bad decision.
I can’t remember ever being told I’m a bad listener