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Ever had sex while camping!? It`s intents!
In marijuana`s defense, I`m lazy as sh!t completely sober too.
Do stupid people ever hit a point in their life, where they realize they’re stupid?
How many calories does swearing like a motherf*cker burn?
Was there even food before people started posting pictures of it on Instagram?
Hey Journey, I stopped believing. What now?
My bank balance is a constant reminder that I`m safe from identity theft
Just bought me a medical alert bracelet that says... "probably just sh!tfaced"
If you`re happy and you know it, thank your ex.
The problem with the world is intelligent people are full of doubts, while stupid people are full of confidence.
A new heavy metal Christian Rock band will soon be releasing their debut album. They`re called Nuns `n` Moses.
Donald Trump`s hair saw its shadow. We have six more weeks of protesting.
Don`t mix Viagra with Iron Supplements. It will cause you to spin around and point north.
Jail is just the government`s way of sending you to your room.
To Do: Figure out how to get paid to travel the world and eat.