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One quality I`m not looking for in a partner is the ability to maintain a virtual farm. #FarmVille
Some relationships are like fat people, they don`t Workout!!
Designated drivers just drive me to drink.
Yeah, you go ahead and climb that mountain "because it`s there", I am going to eat this Pizza "because it`s here"................................
The last time I got drunk I married Satan..I`m not doing either one again
Dark humor is like sex, not everybody always gets it.
Ever wondered why there is a stairway to heaven, and a highway to hell? There´s apparently more traffic going to hell!!
Well I didn`t know that minding my own business becomes part of your business to mind
Thought of the day! Calling me a crazy bitch will only encourage me to prove you right...
Ahhh..Sunday..the biggest decision of the day...to bathe or not to bathe.
Getting told I can`t do something gives me all the motivation I need to get things done.
Yes, my attitude could stand some improvement but my insurance does not cover those medications.
Being an adult is mostly just wondering if the stuff in the dishwasher is dirty or clean while eating soup out of a sand castle bucket.
Be nice to a nerd. Prevent a supervillain.
Sometimes I listen to strangers conversations and mentally give my opinion