Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Last night I saw a documentary about beavers. Best dam show I ever watched.
There are no limits to what you can accomplish when you are suppose to be doing something else.
my cross-eyed girlfriend left me today. She was seeing someone else.
Haters gonna hate, your honor
I wonder if the clouds ever look down on us and say "Hey look! ...that one`s shaped like an idiot!"?
The office Christmas party is a great opportunity to catch up with people you haven`t seen for half an hour.
It`s amazing how we are very good lawyers for our own mistakes and very good Judges for other people`s mistakes.
If you lick the frosting off a cupcake it becomes a muffin, muffins are healthy :) your welcome.
I read recipes the same way I read science fiction. I get to the end and I think, “well that’s not going to happen.”
I`m bored, I think I`ll ask my boyfriend if I look fat. - women
The problem with today`s children is that today`s parents are idiots.
If I had a dollar for every time someone told me I was ugly, I`d be broke as hell because I`m a sexy beast!!
There is only one thing I hate more than lying: skim milk. Which is water lying about being milk.
I don`t know why you are complaining about your appearance, your personality is even worse.
I used to like my neighbors until they changed the password to their wi-fi :)