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Happy people don`t take long showers.
It hurts to be in love. Oh wait, I`m sitting on my keys.
I don`t play sports, the only sport I play is shopping. But there`s a lot of walking involved in that. Running sometimes if there`s a sale.
I`m pretty sure some of you just drag your face across the keyboard and hit send.
So if the Jacksonville Jaguars are known as the “Jags” and the Tampa Bay Buccaneers are known as the “Bucs,” what does that make the Tennessee Titans?
I was playing catch phrase with my family and the phrase I got was `pearl necklace` .. And then I ruined family time...
I`ve seen more pins in the last few days then stone cold steve austin on groundhog day..
I’ve just woken up, and it appears that Earth is temporarily safe from harm & currently doesn’t need my assistance, so I’m going back to bed.
I`d like to eat healthy, but we all know what happened that time Eve ate an apple. Best not to risk it.
Facebook, Pinterest and Instagram have taught us that for every giant technological leap ahead, we will find a way to use it for dumb sh!t.
An empty fridge is a sad fridge.
Nobody talk to me until I`ve Instagrammed my coffee.
My sex life is like a Ferrari ... I don`t have a Ferrari
I heard recently on the radio that, "If a man looks at womens breasts for 10 mins a day he will add 5 years to his life".. Can anyone confirm this?!! If so what are we waiting for?
Leave a comment if you`ve started drinking. Hit the `Like` button if you`re already sh!tfaced. *Cheers*