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My girlfriend and I have an open relationship and will continue to do so right up until she finds out.
When you screw up, menopause can be a wonderful excuse for stupid things you do or say!!!
Possible Fact: White guys with corn rows make dangerous zombies, cuz you can`t possibly run away while laughing that hard at the same time.
I would have a girlfriend but finding someone who likes to be ignored is hard.
According to WebMD, MedicineNet, Healthline, Mayo Clinic, Symptom Checker, NetDoctor, MedlinePlus, Johns Hopkins and InfoMedNet, I`m OCD.
facebooked yo mama!!!
I tried counting sheep to get to sleep, but one was missing and now Iām gonna be up all night worrying.
There are two rules to success in life - 1. Don`t tell people everything you know
Call me old school, but I think your shorts should be longer than your private parts.
Apparently, playing dead only works on bears not ex boyfriends.
Things ain`t nobody got time for: That
When I was a kid, there was no Internet. Sometimes people would walk for miles to call me a bastard.
Laughter is the best medicine, but if you are laughing for no reason, you might need medicine.
Hope dogs are kissing us and not trying to see if we started tasting good yet.
I`m getting really irritated. This is the tenth ATM I`ve been to in the last week that`s had "insufficient funds".