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If the planet is 4 billion plus yrs old. Is 2017 really the correct new year.
My internet was down for almost 4 mins, I’m ok but the 911 operator was a total b!tch about it!
I feel bad for kids nowadays who can`t get the toys they want because their parents have to be 18 or older to call.
I’ve been a sucker for boobies since the day I was born.
Halloween always exposes my weakness for Milk Duds, I am powerless. Tomorrow I will attend MDA, Milk Duds Anonymous
Why would you pay $80 for a bra at Victoria’s Secret when I can hold your boobs up all day for free.
Adding "just sayin" to a smart-a$$ed comment makes you even more of an a$$hole. Just sayin
The Internet: An electronic version of, "Now, why did I walk into this room?"
My favorite part of the movie The Notebook is where I turned it off and watched Terminator 2 instead.
After a while you just get used to people not understanding.
Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.
I`m jealous of my parents, I`ll never have kids as cool as theirs.
If I had a jet pack I would look AWESOME dying within the first 2 minutes of having a jet pack.
I`ve never been a fan of multi-tasking or quite frankly regular tasking.
Try this... When leaving a fancy restaurant tell the people coming in "I recommend you try the donkey, snail or the squirrel".