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There are no bad pictures. That`s just how your face looks sometimes.
Mazda’s marketing slogan is “We Build Mazdas.” They decided on it after rejecting others like: “Mazdas Are Cars” and “Buy Mazdas With Money”
We`re all just nudists in disguise.
Patience is not about how long you can wait, but how well you behave while waiting.
This generation is guilty of making the wrong people rich and famous.
I hate it when my fat makes me look fat.
To be fair, if I had a friend who could turn water into wine - I’d worship him too.
Why did you have to take a half naked picture in front of a full length mirror to show off your new haircut?
Of all the martial arts, Karaoke inflicts the most pain.
Your a$$ must be jealous everytime sh*t comes out of your mouth.
Which one of you is Moderation? I keep getting told we need to drink together.
Not so great minds also think alike.
I think I will stick to my old fashioned pepper shaker. This new pepper spray tastes terrible on my potatoes...
So how many pokes does it take before its considered a heavy petting?
Laughing at your mistakes can lengthen your life. Laughing at your wife’s can shorten it