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I don’t have a problem with caffeine.I have a problem without caffeine.
According to my neighbor’s journal, I have boundary issues.
Stay positive ladies, maybe he just didn`t hear you the first 100 times.
If my "friends" post just two more scripture quotes on Facebook, I will have officially read the entire bible.
I wonder how long I’d be on hold if my call wasn’t important to them...
Saying you like one political party over another, is like saying one filthy whore is prettier than the other filthy whore.
Sometimes, I wonder if the weather app on my phone even looks outside.
I got my stomach by doing as many crunches as I can everyday. Usually either Nestle or Captain.
The worst thing that can happen when you invite someone over to "watch a movie" is actually watching a movie.
Heard Justin Bieber got arrested for drag racing. Sure it`s dangerous, but surely it isn`t against the law to run in high heels...
If Starbucks delivered, I would be a morning person.
I bet cats are mad they can’t sit on televisions anymore.
9 of 10 voices in my head telI me I `m crazy. One hums ...
Highways need 4 lanes per side - A NASCAR wannabe lane, a normal driver lane, an old people who drive 40 in a 70 lane & a "where in the hell am I?" lane.
Whoever named anteaters, solid effort right there.