Daily Silly Status

Wanted: Someone to hand feed me Cheetos so my fingers don`t get orange..... P.S. No weirdos.

I`m looking for a girlfriend that likes me for my money, but is really bad at math...

That awkward moment when the mosquito is more interested in persistently banging it`s head against the windshield of your vehicle in an attempt to escape your presence than it is in trying to bite you. #feelingunattractive

I saw a girl being irresponsible texting while driving and it really ticked me off.....So I rolled down my window and threw my beer at her.

I refuse to jump on the `I hate Mondays` bandwagon. I hate all workdays equally

Definitely never want to own a small fruit stand in an action movie.

I hate how my friends are always trying to convince me to do extreme activities. Like bungee jumping, skydiving or leaving the house.

When you realize that your car matches the one in the Amber Alert.

So far, I am 100% at believing what happened next on Facebook links.

I think 90% of the software on my computer doesn`t do anything except send me notices that there`s a new version of itself.

There`s always cake to celebrate happy moments, but I really think cake would do better during the bad times. Got fired? Have a cake.

Some of us are basically unpaid Facebook interns.

Yawning is our body`s way of saying 10% of battery remaining.

Another funny thing about this status is when you finally realize that it talks about nothing? its all ready too late to stop reading. lol

That moment of shame when an automatic door doesn`t open for you