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Women are so jealous. I bet Eve counted Adam`s ribs everyday to see if another woman had been created.
I`ll be right with you, I`m busy being inappropriate on the internet.
Marriage is just a 50 year long negotiation over thermostat settings.
Lots of us suffer in silence. You should try it.
So you constantly feel sorry for yourself and feel the need to tell everyone all about it. I can’t imagine why he left you.
As long as there is an open textbook in front of you, nobody will question what you are doing on your laptop.
so apparently there is no such thing as a St Patrick`s Santa and I`m not sure whose lap I just sat on at the mall.
I`m just a boy...standing in front of a girl...asking her to lov.....aw who am I trying to fool. I just want in your pants.
I don`t really like the idea that James Franco might be in my grandkids` history textbooks.
Depression is just your body`s way of saying it needs more orgasms.
Marriage is supposed to be permanent. It`s like a tattoo that yells at you.
Facebook: Cause why drunk dial one person when you can drunk post the world?
It’s interesting how the ads on Youtube never have trouble buffering.
How Big is Infinity?
You never outgrow sleepovers, they just become coed.