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French people give me the crepes.
You guys ever trip out on the fact that Indian people eat Indian food for breakfast?
So how many women out there think men are pigs? Gimme a show of tits!
If someone starts a sentence with "words can`t express," brace yourself, because they`re about to give it a hell of a try anyway.
Homeless people should make more creative signs like "I bet you can`t hit me with a quarter...b!tch!"
If I could have dinner with anyone alive or dead I would just have two dinners.
I`ll be drinking tell I see Leprechauns tonight.
Why Am I Sober? - A Horror Story
I`m not lazy, I just rest before I get tired
Whatever Mom, IF THAT`S EVEN YOUR REAL NAME!!!
How to Train Your Dragon offers no practical dragon training information. NONE. Zero stars.
You say you want to bring me back to reality. You’re assuming I’ve been there before.
When it comes to f*cking around, I don`t f*ck around.
Give a man a fish, he’ll eat for a day. Teach a man to fish, he’ll probably be like, “Hey, remember when you used to just give me fish?”
The best part about growing old with you is that I`ll always be the younger one.