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The most common name In China is Chang, correct me if you think it’s Wong.
When I was a kid they didn`t call it "Behavioral Disorders", They called it "Being a little brat".
"Give me your finest meal, money is of no concern." ~ Me at McDonald`s on pay day.
I`ve learned to take life as it comes...straight with no chaser.....
"I got this." Translated: I most certainly do not have this, but prepare to be thoroughly entertained.
I’m that kind of person who between two choices always pick the wrong one.
If your wife asks you if you know where the broom is, it`s not a good idea to ask her if she is going somewhere.
I just read the words "untimely death" and thought, "Man, I hope my death is timely."
I dig, we dig, he dig, she dig, they dig. It`s not a beautiful poem, but it`s very deep.
If your that person that makes microwave popcorn at work, nobody likes you.
If you really want someone to listen to you, start the conversation with "I shouldn`t be telling you this but ..."
I say ” I shouldn’t be telling you this,” at the beginning of every conversation so people will listen to what I’m saying.
In about 20 years, that cherry tattoo on your cleavage is gonna look like a pair of raisins and that butterfly you got tatted on back is gonna look like a moth.
Sometimes I wish people would just bring donuts to work instead of drama.
Line forms here for spankings