Daily Silly Status

If no one comes from the future to stop you from doing it than how bad of a decision can it really be?

I`m so hungry I could Instagram a horse.

When I go into a bar I shout out "YOU CHEATING WHORE!!!!" Whoever turns around is who I`m buying drinks for.

For every action, there is an equal and opposite government program

Maybe Voldemort`s face is flat because he ran into the wrong wall at the train station.

While waiting for the right person, have fun with the wrong one.

Studies confirm that smoking withdrawal (for me) can be fatal (for you).

Sometimes I like to lie in bed, stare at the ceiling and think what it would be like to stare at other ceilings.

Yawning is our body`s way of saying 10% of battery remaining.

You`re the one who wore a red and yellow scarf to class. So don`t look at me weird for shouting "10 points for gryffindor" when you answer questions cause I know you wanted this. -Bfanch

If there is anything I learned from 80`s movies it`s that I`m the best around, and nothing is ever gonna keep me down

They say a dog can retrieve a tennis ball from over a mile away. Seems a bit far fetched to me.

Sometimes, I don`t know how I`m going to get through the day. Then I remember: I have beers waiting for me at home. I can do this for them

Getting old sucks. I use to wake up feeling like a million bucks. Now I feel more like a bounced check.

Testing shows that people in the USA know less about geography than England, Japan and like 100 other countries I`ve never heard of.