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why earn money when it comes easier when you just ask
I feel bad for lions at zoos. How would you feel if a bunch of pizzas came to your house, took your picture, and you couldn`t even eat them.
Why didn`t you tell me that I wasn`t going to like you
I`m glad I learned about parallelograms instead of how to do taxes. It`s really come in handy this parallelogram season.
Nothing stops a yawn faster than a dog trying to lick inside your mouth
I`d like to give a special thanks to my feet for supporting me and to my arms for being by my side at all times.
Yes, bitches be trippin’ but maybe I pushed one.
I don`t really care who wins the elections as long as everyone had fun out there.
I don`t care about your choice in politics, religion, or taste in music... I judge you simply based on football team preference
I would of never even thought of touching half the things that I`ve touched, if it weren`t for the "Do not touch" signs!
A graham cracker is just a white dude selling coke in the ghetto.
I hear there is scientific proof that birthdays are good for you... the more you have the longer you live.
Remember when waking up early on Saturday mornings involved cartoons and not untagging photos on Facebook?
Guys, if you buy ANY woman clothing, & you don’t get her a size S with a gift receipt, you’re an a$$hole.
I got so much Crazy going on that the term "Bi-Polar" would be excessively underestimating my condition, let`s go with "Multi-Polar" from now on.........