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So I´ve narrowed it down and I´m either gonna start a motorcycle gang or take a nap.
If you’re not fully satisfied with your life, do something about it. Or complain about it on the internet. Whatever you prefer.
I just wanted you all to know that I’m leaving Facebook. This ride has been a blast and I’ve made a ton of friends who I really do consider friends in the truest sense. Your humor and wit is amazing. I’ll miss all of you, but I’ve decided I need to spend more time with my family. So... see you after breakfast
Music is best when it’s louder than I can think.
If Shrek can find love, so can you. What I`m trying to say is, you look like Shrek.
I don`t like the term "stalker". I prefer "unpaid private investigator".
I like pressing F5. It`s so refreshing.
I should be cleaning and disinfecting the toilet bowl today cause I have a feeling I`ll be hunched over hugging it later tonight.
I`ve just released my own fragrance...No one on the bus seems to like it though.
The cat seems really pissed off. He must have only had 22 hours sleep.
If you`re married and having trouble, ask "what would Jesus do?" then remember that jesus was never married.
When I was younger I thought I was bipolar. Turns out I was just an a$$hole who was happy about it.
Oh, a spider just landed on my desk... In other news,,, When startled, I can jump 5 feet in the air with just the power of my ass cheeks.
My ex said he would die for me. All I`m saying is, it was his suggestion.
Whenever a wrong number calls me and hangs up I always call em back and tell them it was their loss because I`m really fun to talk to.