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I was going to write something profound and memorable here, but I can`t remember what it was.
You know you`re getting older when you play GTA and spend 3 hours just walking around the map trying to find where you parked your car.
I just got off the couch and I think I accidentally did yoga or some $hit.
Just gonna wait to see how long it takes this police sketch artist to realize I`m describing him.
"This is the ride that killed Jimmy." - me in line, loudly, at amusement parks
There are 7 trillion nerves in the human body. Some people are capable of getting on every last one of them.
I wonder if people that live in Hawaii have screensavers of bumper to bumper traffic?
I think sharks eat people just to be on tv.
I hope the final frame of Breaking Bad is white text on black background: "None of this would have happened if we had Universal Healthcare."
No one your age has any idea what they`re doing either. No matter what age you are.
"Huh?" (my thought for the day)
DiGiorno should start delivering, just to screw with people.
Scientists are saying that social media is making us less accepting and more aggressive. Whatever, a$$holes!
How`d this get posted?
Common sense has become so rare it should be classified as a superpower.