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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wish my ex wife would die ... That`s as far as I got.
If you make something easier for yourself they call you lazy. If you make something easier for everyone else they call you a genius.
Looks like Waldo got on the malasian plane.. well played waldo.. well played..
Stay positive ladies, maybe he just didn`t hear you the first 100 times.
I would like to give thanks to the brave men and women who died a long time ago tasting which plants were edible and which plants were not.
Ever since I installed Adblocker, I have been severely depressed. Hot singles in my area are no longer interested in me.
Did you know: Your life expectancy decreases every time you ... PISS ME OFF
You know you’re working class when your TV is bigger than your book case.
Hey ladies, you know that feeling you get when you roll over & realize you made a horrible mistake? I could give that to you every day.
I ordered some bubble wrap online. It arrived in a box surrounded by packing peanuts.
Obesity: When you buy a hula-hoop and it fits you.
Don`t trust anyone that orders a Medium Pizza....
Maybe my mom was right all those years ago. Maybe I won`t be happy until someone loses an eye. Maybe that`s what`s been missing.
There is no better sunscreen than sitting in a bar.