Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I decided to go on a road trip and not come back till I ran out of money... I made it to the end of the driveway.
They say a womanβs work is never done. Maybe thatβs why they get paid less.
Anyone know when Facebook is sending us our W-2`s?
Today I will kick a$$, and make dreams happen...but first, Coffee.
There has to be an online course that I can take to get over my internet addiction.
My bed is way more comfortable in the mornings than during the night.
Id explain it to you, but I donβt have any crayons with me.
When people tell me "you`re going to regret that in the morning" I sleep in until noon because I`m a problem solver.
Why are there never any good side effects? Just once I`d like to read a medication bottle and see "May cause extreme sexiness."
Neil Armstrong lands on the moon: 5 pictures. Girl goes to Bathroom: 47 pictures.
That awkward moment when you take a bath in the middle of the day and don`t know whether to wear normal clothes or pajamas.
Who`s more foolish, a fool or the person who takes a fool`s advice?
Jake from State Farm works some very crappy hours.
It must suck when billionaires wake up feeling like a million bucks.
Netflix would be by far the best dating site. "Here are 9 other singles in your area who have also watched Pokemon for 12 straight hrs"