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Bathroom hand dryers are amazing if you want to kill a few minutes before wiping your hands on your pants.
My superpower is making people laugh ... Which would be great if I was trying to be funny
It`s a beautiful day, think I`ll skip my meds and stir things up a bit.
The only yoga stretch I’ve perfected is the yawn.
I tried yoga once, but we called it Twister
If you`re going to be stupid, don`t do it on Facebook.
Sometimes I let the words in my mind come out of my mouth. And it feels awesome! B)
I thought I was feeling a little bloated today, turns out I had my underwear on backwards.
I am deleting my twitter right now! Not to seem paranoid but I think people are following me!
When everything else fails... you always have delusion.
They say a dog park is a great place to pick up girls. I don`t have a dog so I am walking around with a bag of poop so I won`t look weird.
love me or leave me,,HEY!!! where is everybody going?
You know it`s been a good night when you wake up and see bite marks on the walls...
I wonder how the Never-ending story is doing.
Wow comma I just realized if I tap the microphone on my keyboard I don`t have to type out my statuses anymore exclamation point