Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
umm umm u know that school where i got the degree from
I hope someone I hate hears their first Christmas song this year in October.
Hell hath no fury like me when Iām slightly inconvenienced and hungry.
I have one question about Insanity, "Are we there yet"?
I get you, anti-evolution people. I`m too lazy to learn science too.
I imagine a world where whining on Facebook is illegal.
You haven`t really made it until people start using your name as a verb.
If the wicked witch of the west melts in water ... How did she bathe?
The one thing you never wanna hear when your father catches you watching porn is... "Scoot over."
My boyfriend is being so nice to me since I showed him how easy it was to remove blood from carpeting...
China has largest population not because the men are extra horny nor women are extra fertile but because... Their condoms are made in China.
A mosquito landed on my balls... Hardest decision of my life.
Is your family tree a cactus? Because everyone on it is a prick.
Dear Diary, the ugly woman at the bank cut in front of me today." Woman: "EXCUSE ME?!" [whispers]"Dear Diary, I think she can hear me."
BOOK FACT: If you took every book at Barnes and Noble and laid them end to end you get thrown out by security and banned from returning.