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I`ve done a lot of things over the years ... But acting normal has never been one of them.
Not every flower can say love, but a rose did. Not every plant can survive thirst, but a cactus did. Not every dummy can read, but look at you go...
Apparently, the answer "I Know" is not a good answer when your friend tells you how good his girlfriend is in bed
Age has its advantages. Too bad I can`t remember what they are.
You never realize what you have till its gone... Toilet paper is a good example.
"Do not touch" must be one of the scariest things to read in braille
I`m not saying your opinion is stupid, I`m just saying you`re stupid for having it
I forgive and forget, because I have a good heart, and a terrible memory.
It was so cold that when we milk the cows we got ice cream.
Here’s the thing about work: I really don’t feel like doing any.
Congratulations India on successfully orbiting a probe around Mars. I assume you`ll be opening call centers on the red planet and using fake Martian names now?
Everything is a boomerang if you throw it upwards.
A girl updated her facebook status saying: All men are dogs and I commented • Which breed is your dad?
I`m on that “Starts tomorrow” diet.
Jingle bells johnny smells, amelia ruled the show, frankies okay, marcus is gay, little mix all the way.. HAY !!!