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Optimism? Sure, it`s worth a try. I don`t see how acting like an eye doctor is gonna help, but whatever.
I need to find a way to be asleep but still get all my work done.
My relationship with whiskey has been on the rocks lately.
Back in my day, we had to remember phone numbers and give people directions and don`t get me started on the dinosaurs.
Listening to your wife is like reading the terms and conditions of a website. Sometimes you understand nothing, and still you say..."I Agree".....!
I gauge a person’s wealth by the level of protection on their iPhone. No case, huge salary.
Getting to places would be so much easier if I had a helicopter.
I chose the wrong fork in the road, took the road less travelled and got off the beaten path and now I don`t know where the hell I am.
Feeling stressed out? Make a nice cup of hot tea and then spill it in the lap of whoever`s bugging you.
Does the 5 second rule apply to soup? Please answer quickly!
If you attached a bunch of watches together to make a belt it would be a waist of time.
Apparently, I`m the only one that wants to drink beer at this intervention.
wassup pips! :-) no i don`t mean you guys pip, get it? piping?? haaahaaa... looks like i`m the only one laughing right? well it sounded funnier in my head (-_-)
I haven`t seen any new episodes of Gilligan`s Island in awhile... I hope they`re OK.
Don`t be afraid of a few extra pounds, fat people are much harder to kidnap.