Mobile App Coming Soon - Daily Silly Status

Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!

Bought some cheese at one of those fancy cheese shops today. It was legend dairy...
I watch CSI for the great tips they give out.
I stick pins and needles in the people I don`t like because can`t afford voodoo dolls.
Teaching your dog to fetch a beer is smart. Fetching it from the neighbours house is genius.
Accidentally missed the freeway exit for home, now I’m heading north to start a new life.
I regret nothing but mostly because I can`t remember most of the stuff I should probably regret
In actuality, Batman is just a more violent and dark version of Inspector Gadget.
Mario Bros. Plumbing ????? (69 Reviews) Hired them to clear my drain, stomped my turtle to death and ran off with my girlfriend.
I`m not an alcoholic I just have a lot of things to celebrate.
When a man says he`ll do anything for a woman, he means slaying dragons, killing zombies and rescuing her from castle towers. IT DOES NOT MEAN cleaning garage, fixing roof and cleaning out the basement!
There’s nothing like having a long to-do list to make me feel like doing absolutely nothing.
Today everything gets answered by the magic eight ball
Setting an alarm is how we ruin days that haven`t even started yet.
Laziness is nothing more than the habit of resting before you get tired.
It`s nice to feel wanted. Even if it`s by the FBI.