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Unsettling sounds #23 - Ice-cream van after dark
When a girl tells you she has a nipple piercing, the correct response is always "I don`t believe you."
Today is International Women’s Day. It was actually supposed to be held 2 days ago but they took too long to get ready.
It would be cool if you heard a thunder bug a few seconds after you saw a lightning bug.
To ensure you never cut yourself while chopping vegetables, get a friend to hold the vegetable.
Man, that .01% of germs that can´t be killed by hand sanitizer must be some bad a$$ sh!t
a friend will calm you down when you`re angry a best friend will run beside you with a baseball bat shouting, "somebody`s gonna get it!"
In my porno they`d deliver the pizza after they had sex because otherwise it`d just get cold.
I wish the Microsoft Paperclip would just pop up when I’m making a questionable decision for my life.
Million dollar idea: A bathroom mirror that takes pictures.
How much Hershey`s Chocolate Syrup can I add before it`s really not a SlimFast shake anymore?
is running out of excuses for the stupid things I do. Please submit suggestions below.
I don`t know why it`s necessary to get a glass dirty, when wine tastes perfectly fine straight out of the bottle.
Save water, shower together.
The person before me got $0.57 worth of gas. My day doesn`t seem so bad now.