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Life is so much funnier if you have a dirty mind
I just want to find someone who will love me for exactly who I am pretending to be.
Its funny how your friends change , Meet new people and forget about you . :( But just know i`ll still be in your heart?
You make me want to be a drunker person
Coffee: fueling you for a job you can`t stand to support a life you never wanted. Tastes good though...
Don`t be embarrassed by who you are. Unless you`re stupid. Then you`re pretty much screwed.
Sometimes you can just tell it`s going to be a "Does not play well with others" kind of day.
Don`t bother trying to figure me out...not even the little voices in my head understand me...it`s pointless.
Adam and Eve were the first people to agree to the Apple terms and conditions without reading them.
why waste your brain cells to think of a comment when you can just like someone else`s?
OMG!!!!! I almost went to the toilet without my phone!
When you`re a kid, dick jokes are considered adult content, but when you`re an adult, they`re considered immature.
Single, means never having to say you`re sorry.
Do you ever just look at someone and think "Wow, let me take off your pants."
I really think my life would be a lot better if my fitness app would just lower its standards