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I`m getting really tired of being really tired of stuff.
Where 5 minutes becomes 5 hours. Facebook.
I`m so ghetto.... I had lights and water bill in my name before the age of 3..
My family says I talk in my sleep but nobody at work has ever mentioned it.
The only thing worse than sitting on a cold toilet seat is sitting on a warm one.
I dont need to control my anger everyone around me needs to control their habit of pissing me off!
You`re in your 20`s... you don`t have "haters"... you have "adults" that think you are "annoying"
Just heard some guy yell "F**K!" ... I thought this was impressive because not many people can pronounce asterisks.
If I had a dollar for every time I thought about you, I would start thinking about you.
I fear the day when our kids would look at old you tube videos of us doing the Harlem Shake and Gangnam Style and think what a retarded generation ours was.
Do you women realize how silly you all look with your clothes on?
For a guy who makes as many bad decisions as I do, I feel like I should be having more fun.
Girl scout cookies suck! I ate like 20 boxes of thin mints and I`m not any thinner.
There`s nothing like the laughter of a baby....unless you`re home alone at 1 am...and you don`t have children...
I found a penny today that reminded me of you. Totally worthless and always in a stranger`s pants.