Your home to over 150,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
Ever since I heard that women have one breast bigger than the other, it`s given me another reason to stare.
Whoever said money can’t buy happiness didn’t know where to shop and where to spend it
Can someone else be a sex symbol today? ... My good T-shirt is still in the wash...
I`ll never fly Virgin Airlines. Why would anyone want to fly an airline that doesn`t go all the way.
Drinking coffee is a fun way to become dependent on paying money to wake up.
Make your girlfriend scream your name, leave the toilet seat up.
Experience is what you get, when you don`t get what you want
People that are organized are just too lazy to look for things.
I wonder how many people read my statuses and say `I hope he`s getting professional help`?
Trying to untwist a twizzler is a real b*tch and this gas station cashier yelling at me isn`t helping.
I listen to all of of the voices in my head...except the one named Reason. He makes NO sense to me.
You can always tell a lot about a woman the way she pours gasoline around your car.
My room isn`t messy. I just prefer to have my favorite items on display.
roes are red violets are blue he`s for me not for you if for any chance you`ll take my place i`ll use my fist and smash your face
A fun way to "Break up" is to tell them to "Go long" and then never throw them the football.