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Some women need to realize that showing cleavage doesn`t fix your face.
Excessive consumption of alcohol seems like a good idea.
If you feel down because you had a bad day! Chin up! Tomorrow is another day and the worst has yet to come!
Mothers never really understand the irony of calling their children "come here you son of a bitch"
I`m scared of the pesticides on this produce, so I guess I`ll run them under cold water for half a second
screw flowers, its all about chia pets ;)
You can`t fix stupid, but you can always drink more beer.
I saw some footage of some polar bears drinking water today. It’s obviously fake. Everybody knows they only drink Coca-Cola.
This is my first lame status of the year. Enjoy!
When I`m in a good mood I act like I`m I`m in a bad mood so nobody approaches me and ruins my good mood.
There is 2 address we will always know by heart, 1: Our Own, and 2: P. Sherman 42 wallyby way Sydney!
There’s gotta be a better use for the part of my brain that remembers every word to “Baby Got Back.”
Got a paper cut turning the pages in my self-defense book.
In life you will meet all sorts of people, happy, moody, shy, loud, weird, and then there`s me So deal with it mmuhaaaaaaaahaaahaaaa that`s right !
Apparently I`d rather debate in my mind whether or not to get up and pee than sleep.