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I was sitting on the toilet when the guy in the stall next to me started smoking. Disgusting . . . I nearly couldn’t finish my sandwich.
Dancing in the 70`s: I have absolutely no idea what I am pointing at
18 is TOO young to get married! You can`t even buy booze at 18! If you can`t buy booze, how the hell are you gonna make a marriage work?!?
When I was growing up the TV was my nanny.
You say tomato, I say summertime snowball.
Just told my dog "Don`t walk in your own poop" and it strikes me as good advice to pass on to the rest of you as well. Please: don`t.
It might look like I`m doing nothing, but at the cellular level I`m quite busy.
I was called a village idiot today which really upset me ... I live in a city.
Autocorrect is changing correctly spelled words. I’m starting to think it has a mind of its AUTOCORRECT IS HARMLESS. GO ABOUT YOUR BUSINESS.
Sometimes I want to comment on a photo on Facebook but then I don’t wanna have to explain why I’m in your ‘Random Party Pics 08' album at 4am.
If women ran the world we wouldn’t have wars, just intense negotiations every 28 days.
I hate that little line of dirt that I can never get into the dust pan.
Love means never having to say you’re sorry until you`ve thought up a good excuse.
To the guy who invented Zero: Thanks for nothing!
New favorite term: Multislacking. It’s nice to find a name for something you’re good at.