π Daily Silly Status
Your home to over 25,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I just ended a long-term relationship today ... Iβm ok though, it wasnβt mine.
only 9530 days until retirement.
Boy if these walls could talk I`d be like "HOLY SH!T TALKING WALLS"
ah... Crocs the 21st century version of the chastity belt
Texts from mom: Thanks to the supreme court, now it`s not just women who won`t marry you.
Somebody asked for my name today, and when I told them they said "That`s an unusual name. You don`t hear that everyday" to which I replied "Well actually... I do"
Are the unmarried employees at Kraft known as Kraft singles?
Use Angie`s List if you want a plumber to come over. Use Craigslist if you want that plumber to come over with no pants.
Dear Customer Service: First of all, you should know that IΒ΄m typing this with my middle finger.
If your parachute doesn`t deploy don`t worry, you have the rest of your life to fix it.
Why don`t the post office get the Jehovah`s Witnesses to deliver the mail on Saturday? Work smarter not harder people.
I got kicked out of the audience of "Cats" on Broadway for bringing a laser pointer.
Laughing is the best medicine. But if youβre laughing for no reason, you need medicine.
I felt really mischievous earlier so I bought a McDonalds and ate it at a KFC
My wife can suffer in silence louder than anyone I know.