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Easter can be just as much fun as an adult as it was as a child. Just paint and hide beer cans instead of eggs.
I have a feeling I already know which direction my "Get rich or die trying" lifestyle is headed.
It`s Thanksgiving. Don`t forget to set your scale back 25 lbs
Don’t tell me what to do unless you’re naked.
At long last, I`ve finished my research into the effect alcohol has on physical movement.....The results were, quite frankly, staggering.
When I go running, I usually meet new people..... like paramedics.
My face is a 4, my personality is a 6, so basically, I`m a 10.
You had me at “We’ll make it look like an accident.”
I simply haven’t seen enough solid evidence that suggests not drinking is better than drinking.
I`ve discovered two things today... 1. My cat looks so cute in people clothes. 2. I`m probably going to die alone.
Of course everyone deserves a 2nd chance, but I gave yours to someone else.
My new year`s resolution is that donuts have no calories.
The only stock options I have are chicken and beef.
SEX! Now that I got your attention. I just wanted to say, "Have a great weekend!"
Have you ever loved someone so much, you wanted to keep them hidden from the world and all to yourself? Well, apparently its called kidnapping