😄 Daily Silly Status
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I shook the vending machine until my chips fell, so yeah, I’m a hunter-gatherer.
There’s a wild side to EVERY innocent face.
I`m thinking of changing my voicemail to the following: "If you have reached this recording, please hang up and text me."
Last year in college football Alabama beat Arkansas, Tennessee, and Auburn. Those teams coaches all resigned. Any chance of Alabama playing agsinst the White House this year?
That awkward moment when you say goodbye to someone and then both walk in the same direction..
If my father taught me one thing, it was probably how to take both hands off the wheel to sarcastically applaud people in traffic.
If someone tells you "it`s better than sex" they`re not doing the sex right.
If at first you don`t succeed then maybe you just suck.
Is it just me or is waking up at 3am and trying to read a text message like looking directly into the sun?
Facebook should allow people to be in a relationship with food. That would be my relationship for eternity.
I feel so lazy.. Lazy as the guy who created the Japanese flag
I listen to all of of the voices in my head...except the one named Reason. He makes NO sense to me.
People were shocked when they found I wasn`t a good electrician. :-)
I like how the package for cotton swabs says don`t put them in your ears and everyone in the world is thinking: "WTF else would I do with them?!"
be smart, pretend to be stupid!