š Daily Silly Status
Your home to over 25,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
I may not be the best looking, wittiest, smartest or even the most successful person. I forget where I was going with this...
At first, I had my doubts about using autocorrect. But my new phone probed me wrong. PROVED DAMNIT! PROVED!
My wife started clipping coupons to help save money. She keeps them in the side pocket of her $800 purse.
I took a poll recently, and 100% of strippers were angry they had nothing to dance on.
Women`s magazines are so funny. 1: You`re beautiful and perfect just the way you are! 2: How to lose 20 pounds in 10 days.
Last night I went out drinking with some high school friends. About 2 hours into it they were like..."dude, shouldn`t you be hanging out with people your own age?"
I wonder how long I`d be on hold if my call wasn`t important to them.
Ever get out of the shower and not remember getting a towel ready but its there anyway? You`re welcome.
There may be no excuse for laziness, but I`m still looking.
A hot woman telling me about her boyfriend is like setting money on fire in front of a homeless person.
When you`re a kid, you hate those moments when there is absolutely nothing to do. As an adult, you live for them.
Iām sorry for what I said when I was hungry.
And Jesus said, those footprints on the beach where two sets become one, that`s where I unfollowed you.
Not every flower can say love, but a rose did. Not every plant can survive thirst, but a cactus did. Not every dummy can read, but look at you go...... *high 5*
How much tequila goes into mashed potatoes again?