😄 Daily Silly Status
Your home to over 25,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
It was awkward when she said, "And yet your feet are so big."
I miss flip phones because at the end of a conversation you could always dramatically close them like, bitch whatever.
Let`s start by taking some notes today. I`m fabulous bitches! Write that down.
Comcast is doing home security now so if your house is being robbed they will get the police there on Tuesday between the hours of 8 & 12.
Nothing makes you feel more insignificant than still having 85% battery at noon.
It`s Friday the 13th. Good thing I`m not superstitious, it`s unlucky to be superstitious...
stupidity is a privelege entitled to everyone but you my dear are abusing this right
It isn`t a successful BBQ until some drunken idiot walks face first into a closed sliding glass door. I`m fine by the way.
Not to brag, but I have completely mastered the right way to do everything wrong.
Someday, the time I waste deciding what to watch on Netflix will be shorter than the actual time watching it
Suddenly my prison fantasy football league just got real.
"No! Don`t leave me! I need you! Nooooo!" I say as my laptop cords slowly slides off my bed onto the floor.
I just had a threesome in the shower with Johnson and Johnson.
My number was 0...
Me: You`re the prettiest girl I`ve ever seen. Her: You just want to have sex with me. Me: And you`re smart too, I like that.