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I wish you could order Karma like flowers and have it delivered.
People that use statistics in everyday arguments are a$$holes 100% of the time.
Always remember to speak clearly when complimenting a woman`s boots...
I love Halloween because it`s the only night of the year I may end up getting drunk with Batman and going home with a cheerleader.
Do you think people in Mexico ever say, "Those jobs keep stealing all our Mexic?ns!"
I have an inferiority complex about my superiority complex. I know I`m better than you, but I feel really bad about it.
My problem? Smart phones are too smart.
Researchers claim that the Internet is making us dumber and more impatient. I don`t get it. Moving on.
Most people don’t act stupid – it’s the real thing.
I wish I had money so I could be eccentric instead of just weird.
I speak my mind because it hurts to bite my tongue.
A recent study has found that woman who carry little extra weight live longer then the man who mention it
Sure, I`ll show up at your Halloween Party... I`ll be coming as the invisible man....
Get Dora and Boots on this missing plane case now, Dora solves the case everytime
I love in horror movies how the person yells out "hello?!" as if the killer is gonna say "yeah I´m in the kitchen, want a sandwich?"