😄 Daily Silly Status
Your home to over 25,000 silly Facebook statuses! Find the perfect witty, silly, or downright funny status to share with your friends and family. Check in daily for fresh updates!
The pill is the second best thing women can put in their mouths to prevent pregnancy.
Decided to make a life altering decision today.... When I think of it I`ll let you know
I`m not impatient. You`re just slow.
I drive everywhere but for some reason my shoes still wear out, it’s like there’s just no reward for laziness.
At least men and women agree on one thing, they both don’t trust women.
Saw a billboard ad for potato chips that proudly claimed "There`s a lot of pride in every bag!" Hmmm...is "pride" another word for "air"?
I smoked weed once and realized spoons are just little bowls on sticks
The parent-teacher conference is going great. They have no idea I’m not the teacher.
Ladies, how do I work my man boobs and get out of a ticket? Quick, she`s coming.
I like when videogames limit how many things you can hold. "You have 100 items in an invisible bag. Carrying another would be unrealistic"
Revenge is not in my plans. You`ll f*ck yourself on your own.
I may be delusional but at least I`m going to Mars in November.
My opinion of yoga pants varies depending on if I`m at the gym or if I`m at Walmart
Remember before Amazon reviews when you could just buy a toothbrush without 6 hours of research?
Ok everyone enough of your "family" time, come back to the internet. We are your real family.